How did Jerry do it?

I said, I'd write about Shyness. Not really in the mood though. So let me just quickly say, I think shyness is sometimes a cop out. What it really is, is fear. To say you're too shy is to say you are too afraid. Not always, but many times anyways. Really what this is all about is, I'm going to go out and do things and join clubs or go to events or talk to people or force myself to try karaoke (if it doesn't conflict with my schedule for other things) and not let myself be too afraid to try things. I've stated I'd like to be more outgoing a few times before. With...limited results. I guess this is just part of that as well. I spent all morning verifying the bug fixes of romania guy. tiring. i still need to get my own work done. Remember that Seinfeld episode where Jerry is trying to figure out how to breakup with another guy? ......ok, now remember that doorman, Michael, that always talks to me....yeah.....I have no problem talking to the guy. Its kind of interesting. But at the same time, I don't want it to be an obligation that I have to talk to the guy every single time I pass by him. Plus he does most of the talking. And its always about life and faith, and god and beign about others and not oneself and its too much. i agree with a lot of what he's sayign but must i talk about it everytime. how about just a conversation that goes, how about that local sports team eh? i dont' know, something more basic. though we did talk about food and pool once. and now, i'm roped into going to play pool with him next week. i like pool. but. ok, he's a nice guy. but some people are people you talk to when you see them. and other people are your friends that you talk to regularly and the conversations with him just dont feel natural. its too forced. such irony. i complain that i dont' have many people to talk to or hang out with and this is what happens. stuck with someone that keeps talking to me and wants to do something but i just don't feel a natural friendship with him. sigh.... i'l go play pool though still. i said i would and its the nice thing to do as well. plus i haven't played pool in ages. don't know how good he is, but i want to just smoke him. not cause its him i just want to play pool and play some good games. Darrin's not here and usually i'd just play and beat him (hehehe) so i'll have to settle for beating michael. I think i just need a way to end the conversations with michael. an escape. Where is that made up conversation escape device Brent wanted to invent? Yesterday, I got saved after 25!mins, by Hemayna (not sure if thats how she spells it). Girl on the 9th floor of my building, asknig if she could borrow my laptop for 5mins to download her assignment. She's in econ or something I forget. Even after she asked and I said yes, I still couldn't get out of the conversation for like another 10mins. He's off this weekend though, I think Kevin or Riccardo will be working. Thank goodness. I need my weekend to be a break...although the way work is lately...it might not be...k, back to the grind.